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Trusting Beginnings

April 20, 2019

Today’s verse:  Jeremiah 29:11

 

“I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.”

 

I am preparing for a change in my life.  Change is an interesting thing.  It is something that we are guaranteed to have throughout our life and into our death. It is something that can be feared, and drive anxiety.  It can be something that excites and brings joy. Sometimes it brings joy and anxiety at the same time or a whole rainbow of emotions.  Most of the time, change is some combination of emotions in between the extremes. 

 

I know that what I am choosing to move into, is a great opportunity that will use all of my knowledge, gifts and experiences. I am truly excited by the opportunity that it offers me. I know this without a doubt. Even knowing this, throughout the discerning process there were times when I let the thoughts in my head take over. The thoughts driven by childhood perspective and experiences, the negative ones and they can really beat one down. The thoughts of, I am not good enough, I am too old, I am not pretty enough, and on and on.  The most oppressive one is the fear that comes from the thought of –What if I fail.

 

My deep belief in my God, Jesus and the infinite Spirit, tells me that the negative thoughts are not real, true or who I was made to be. Even knowing this they still come. They still invade my mind and what I know is true.  I am, after all is said and done, human.  We are uniquely created by the divine, but we also have our life experiences and perceptions, these become a part of who we are how and how we think. I become a doubting Thomas sifting through all that is negative.

 

Moving forward, I am working daily on getting out of my head.  The thoughts may come, but I do not have to give them value. I can mentally scream “Get Thee Back Satan!” and hold on to what I know is right. To quote the sub-title of a favorite self-help book, “ Get out of your head, and into your life!”

 

How do I plan on doing this? Pray.  Journaling, finding insights in the Bible and writing them down with my thoughts and feelings. Stopping and taking a breath when my mind starts to go down the wrong path, and switch to repeating my personal mantra. Put myself first. Set boundaries and create a close and trusted support group that will listen and walk with me.

 

Most of all I am going to embrace the change with the energy and excitement that it deserves, and get onto living my life. I am going to put my trust into change and new beginnings.

 

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